The short version
- PACE stands for Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy. It is a way of approaching connection, not a set of lines to memorise.
- PACE is not named in the Children's Homes (England) Regulations 2015. A home may choose it as part of its approach, but it is not a legal requirement.
- Acceptance does not mean agreement. Warmth, boundaries, safeguarding and clear expectations still belong in the same conversation.
- The useful question is not whether a team can say it uses PACE. It is whether staff can use its ideas consistently and thoughtfully when the moment is hard.
What PACE means
PACE is short for Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy. It sits within the wider Dyadic Developmental Practice approach, where it is used as a memorable way to think about how adults show up in ordinary interactions. In a children's home, people often use the four words as a helpful shared language.
That distinction matters. PACE is not a behaviour-management programme, and it should not be treated as a substitute for therapy or specialist clinical input. It is a way of choosing a response before the room gets louder: a little less judgement, a little more interest, and a steady enough presence to keep the relationship open.
It will not suit every interaction. It will not suit every child in the same way. A child who is overwhelmed, a child who has been hurt, a child who is testing a boundary and a child who needs space are not all asking the adult for the same thing. PACE is useful when it helps staff notice that, rather than assuming one response will fit every situation.
PACE in a children's home
Residential care is full of small, repeated moments. Getting up for school. Coming back late. An argument over the television. A difficult phone call. The discussion after an incident. A child deciding whether to let an adult close enough to help.
PACE offers a way to approach those moments with connection in mind. It can help a team move from “How do we stop this?” to “What might be happening here, and what response is most likely to help?” That is a practice choice, not a rule. It does not mean every behaviour has the same cause, or that staff should abandon their own professional judgement.
Its value, when it has one, comes from being shared. A young person is unlikely to experience a consistent approach if one worker uses curiosity, another jumps straight to consequences and a third tries to smooth over every upset. The point is not that everybody becomes identical. It is that the team develops enough common ground to respond with care and clarity.
The four parts of PACE
The words are easy to list. The judgement is in knowing what they mean for this child, in this moment, and when not to use them.
| Part | What it can look like | What it is not |
|---|---|---|
| Playfulness | A gentle, respectful lightness that lowers the temperature when it is welcome. It might be a shared smile, an imaginative observation or simply a less confrontational tone. | Being flippant about distress, forcing cheerfulness or trying to joke a child out of something serious. |
| Acceptance | Letting a child know that their feelings can be heard without shame. “I can see this has really got to you” is different from agreeing with every action that followed. | Excusing harmful behaviour, removing a consequence without thought or accepting a risk that needs action. |
| Curiosity | Wondering aloud, listening and leaving room for uncertainty. “I wonder if something else made today feel harder?” may invite more than an accusation does. | An interrogation, a way to obtain a disclosure, or a reason to keep asking once a child has said no. |
| Empathy | Showing that you have understood the weight of the feeling, even when you cannot solve the problem. It can be as simple as staying present and naming what you can see. | Taking over, making assumptions about a child's experience or promising an outcome you cannot deliver. |
A useful test is whether the response leaves the child with dignity and the adult with enough clarity to do their job. If it does neither, the label is not doing much work.
Warmth and boundaries belong together
This is where PACE can be misunderstood. Acceptance is not approval. Empathy is not agreement. Curiosity is not permission to avoid a difficult decision. A relationship-centred approach should not make the adult vague about safety, expectations or what needs to happen next.
It can sound like this: “I understand that you are furious and I am going to stay with you while it settles. You cannot throw things at people. We will make the room safe first, then we can talk about what happened.” The tone is calm. The boundary is still clear.
PACE should never be used to set aside safeguarding processes, conceal a concern or delay a necessary response to risk. Where there is an immediate safety issue, staff must follow the home's arrangements. Where there is a disclosure, staff should follow the home's usual safeguarding and recording procedures. PACE may shape how a conversation feels. It does not replace the professional responsibilities around it.
Making it a shared approach
Writing PACE into a statement of purpose or a therapeutic model is the easy part. The harder work is helping it become recognisable in the everyday choices a team makes.
There is no prescribed implementation model. The following is simply a sensible starting point for a home that has chosen PACE as part of its approach:
- Start with why. Be clear about why this approach makes sense for the children the home cares for and how it fits with the rest of the home's practice.
- Give staff a shared foundation. Training can introduce the language, but staff also need time to ask what it means in their role and where its limits are.
- Bring real practice to supervision. Use a recent, anonymised interaction. What did the worker notice? What response did they choose? What might they try differently next time?
- Keep the team honest. PACE should not become a shorthand for avoiding challenge. Teams need to be able to ask each other, respectfully, whether an approach was both compassionate and clear.
- Review rather than declare success. Listen to children where appropriate, notice patterns in practice and adjust. A model should earn its place in a home, not become untouchable because it has a good name.
None of those steps is a statutory PACE requirement. They are management choices that can help turn a useful idea into something more than a poster on the wall.
Training, reflection and evidence
A course can create a common starting point. It cannot, on its own, tell you whether a team is using an approach well. That happens over time, in supervision, handovers, team discussions and the moments staff revisit after a difficult shift.
If a home chooses PACE training, it is worth being clear about the purpose. Is the aim shared language? More confidence in difficult conversations? A wider change to the home's therapeutic model? The answer will affect who needs the training, what follow-up they need and how the Registered Manager reviews whether it is helping.
Keeping a record of what staff have completed, what reflection has followed and any agreed next steps is sensible practice. It is not a PACE-specific legal requirement. The value of the record is that it lets the home see whether training has become practice, rather than an isolated completion certificate.
PACE in Practice is Nest Learn's online course for residential care staff. It introduces the four elements of PACE alongside attachment, developmental trauma, shame and blocked trust, while being clear that PACE is not therapy and does not remove boundaries.
What the law does and does not say
The Children's Homes (England) Regulations 2015 do not name PACE or require a particular therapeutic model. That is important. A provider should not describe PACE as a mandatory Ofsted requirement, because it is not one.
The regulations do set duties around the quality of care and the experience, qualifications and skills of staff. They are framed around the children a home cares for, rather than a national list of named approaches. If a provider chooses PACE, the useful question is therefore not “Does PACE make us compliant?” It is whether the choice is reasoned, understood by staff and appropriate to the home, its statement of purpose and the needs of its children.
That is general information, not legal or regulatory advice. The source documents are linked below and should be read directly when making a policy, training or registration decision.
Questions
What does PACE stand for in children's homes?
PACE stands for Playfulness, Acceptance, Curiosity and Empathy. It is a relational way of approaching conversations and connection. It is not a script, and it does not remove professional boundaries.
Is PACE mandatory in children's homes?
No. The Children's Homes (England) Regulations 2015 do not name PACE or require a particular therapeutic model. A home may choose PACE as part of its approach, but that is different from a legal requirement.
Does PACE mean accepting challenging behaviour?
No. Acceptance concerns a child's feelings and inner experience. It does not mean agreeing with, ignoring or excusing behaviour that causes harm. Clear expectations, safeguarding and proportionate boundaries still matter.
How can a children's home introduce PACE?
Begin by deciding why PACE fits the home's approach and the children it cares for. Training, supervision and everyday reflection can then help the team build a shared understanding. The goal is not identical phrases, but greater consistency and thoughtful professional judgement.
A note on scope. This guide describes PACE in general terms for children's homes in England. It is not legal, regulatory, clinical or therapeutic advice. It does not replace a home's safeguarding procedures, a child's care plan or the judgement of appropriately qualified professionals. Read the linked sources directly and check their current wording before relying on them.